Thursday, July 28, 2005

NLP: Self-Talk & Advanced Language Patterns


I have just completed the Advanced Language Patterns Module of the NLP Practititioner Training today. During the closing of the program, I suggested that we can make greater use of the Advanced Language Patterns in our self-talk.

We talk to ourselves all the time and it is very OK to talk to yourself. It is normal. It is good if you say something good to yourself. And It's bad if you tell yourself you are bad.

Take special care if you always say something good then follows by a "but" and then something bad. Your mind will be drawn to what had said after the "buts". For example, you tell yourself: I can do it but it is very hard to do so. You are telling yourself that it is very hard.

You can always replace the "but" with "and", i.e. I can do it and it is very hard to do so. You mind takes both statements. Or even better, you can replace the "but" with "even though", i.e. I can do it even though it is very hard to do so.

Don't you think that the last statement is much, much more encouraging to yourself?

Try this yourself. You can do it even though it is a bit odd when you start using it!

Explore, Exceed & Excel

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Regret what you haven't done!


One of my friends passed away yesterday.

I knew that she was in hospital for more than 6 months. I promised to visit her but I never did so. I was too "busy" and I did "not" have the time to see her.

I am really sad hearing her death. But I regret even more. I regret I haven't spent just a few hours to see her. Another friend told me today that she want to see me before her death. But I disappointed her.

I will forgive myself. I can do nothing to change the reality. But I promise myself today that I will do everything that need to be done in the future. I will not allow this kind of regrets happening in my life again.

Lesson Learned: Do what you need to do. Or you are going to regret what you haven't done.


Monday, July 25, 2005

Concepts 101: Part 0 - Needs & Wants


In these 2 weeks, I always felt confused. This seldom happens to me. Being a coach, I start coaching myself.

1. What's happening?
2. How did this caused my confusions?
3. How do I know?

Then I am shocked to find out that all the confusions came from my Number 1 Differentiation, which I always preached.

Needs & Wants!!!

I am wanting something that's not my needs! That's the source of all my frustrations and confusions.

My need is simple and I am wanting something much more than my need. I make up my mind immediately. I simply go for my need and forget my unrealistic wants.

I feel peaceful.

Lesson Learned: Realistic "wants" create improvements, unreslistic "wants" produce sufferings.


P.S. Needs = Something you can't live without, e.g. air, water, food, good friends, etc

P.P.S. Wants = Some extras, they can just make your feel "better" if you have them.

Saturday, July 23, 2005

Notebook of da Vinci


I had just presented a seminar on the Genius Principles of da Vinci a few days ago.

Many estimated the IQ of da Vinci is as high as 220!!!

I have been studying da Vinci since 1996. I started with his notebooks. I read all those 1566 items again and again in the past years.

Reading these notes is not an interesting act. Most of the notes of da Vinci are quite boring and with confusions. But they are inspiring.

If you are serious about learning from this super genius, it is a good idea to start with his notes, not from any other books written about him. These are his firsthand information.

As a coach and trainer, my mission is not to teach anyone anything. I just want to do something to induce others' thinking. Through a better thinking, they solve their own problems and create their destinies.

I can't teach anyone thinking. But our genius, da Vinci can. Learn from him and you can also own a genius's mind.

So I decided to distribute da Vinci's note, 1 item a day through email to anyone who want to learn from this genius. I will also add my own ideas in the email as yoru reference. My ideas are not my interpreatation of da Vinci's notes. It is just my thought.

I can't promise I can do it everyday. But I will complete all 1566 items in the coming few years.

If you want this email service, just send a blank email to I will start Notes 1 in August 2005.


Friday, July 08, 2005

Link Between Super Calm & Super Achiever

Previously, I had mentioned the paradox between being super-calm and being a super-achiever.

There must a link between the 2, or else you will find a single super-achiever who is also very calm. In reality, there are there are this kind of super-achievers out there.

I personally have several friends who are this kind of achievers.

I studied them carefully and I discovered at least 2 links.

1. All of them have clear goals (or least they know exactly what they want). Having clear goals is the first step of get achievement. Being ambitious but without a clear goals creates lots of stress. So, with clear goals, you can direct your effort to what you want. Decisions become much easier.

2. All of them always find/create more choices for themselves. Without choices, you are forced to do in one single way. Being forced is stressful. Without choices, one can't be too successful as am achiever. You never can see the best option and act accordingly.

Being a calm achiever, having clear goals and more choices are your goal.

There should be some more links. If you have any insight, do share with us.

Keith To

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Super Calm & Super Achiever


I am playing around these 2 opposing ideas in the past few days.

Being super calm, you might not have the drive and energy to be a super achiever.

Being a super achiever, you might not have the luxury to be super calm.

However, if you are not calm, you can't see the opportunities to achieve. Even you can see them, you might not be calm enough to take appropriate actions to realize them.

If you want to be an achiever, you will make yourself very busy in taking actions. This creates lots of stress and you can't be calm again!

This is a paradox. But if you can see through this paradox, you can then be a super achiever.

I am now working very calmly to get through this paradox.


P.S. I am going to present my findings this Thursday (July 7 2005) at St. James. This is part of the Business Skills Advancement Program. If you are interested, call Richard Fung at 2835-4394 to enroll. You can enroll in this module only.

P.P.S. Visit for more details.